I had a great weekend or what I’d like to call a weekend. Secretly I already knew it was going to be a great weekend, but that doesn’tkill my fun. I’d like to share my happiness with you guys, hoping you feel happy too. Since it also involved my wheelchair I thought why not put it in my wheelchair stories category: it technically is a wheelchair story ;).
So thursday evening my fellow Hippo (my partner) and I arrived at my parent’s house. Usually my partner stays at our house, but this time he came along for our special dinner on Friday. I enjoy everything more when he’s around. Not just because I feel a lot safer and know I’m in good hands when I have a panic attack or something. I love him a lot and just enjoy spending every minute with him.
I was in time to go with my mom to the zumba class, which is always a lot of fun. I’ll talk about that some other time 🙂
Sadly, I couldn’t go to hot yoga on Friday, because my body was in a too bad shape, but my fellow Hippo and I did something fun instead. We went to our favourite thrift shop! Yay, I wanted to go there again for a while now, especially with my partner. Even though we couldn’t find everything we needed, I’m still happy with the things we did buy. I bought a lovely t-shirt which looks new and is nice and soft. It was even in sale! That’s one of the things that makes this thrift shop so great, but I’ll write more about the thrift shop some other time too. Since it’s one of my favourite pleasure-trips to do and you can do it for like an hour, so our bodies won’t be too sick from it. My brother was kind enough to drive us, so we could go. It’s also easier with carrying the stuff and pushing me in the wheelchair, although I’m quite an experienced shopping cart by now. We also found an old videogame which I couldn’t find for years. It’ll bring back those good old memories and it’s nice to have something easy to do when you’re tired, but not exhausted.
[Photo of the words Thrift shop on a wall].
Friday evening we went to our favourite restaurant to celebrate that my fellow Hippo, my brother and I graduated for the exams we took. My partner and brother will be going to university now and I’ll take some more exams next year and then probably go too. It was nice to have the family together (my parents, brother, my partner and me). This time I noticed that when we are there, I start to fall even more in love with my partner. I can’t really describe it. I just have even more trouble to stop looking at him and my father already said last time that I looked so amourous at him. Without making the other uncomfortable. It’s not like I don’t feel my love for my partner, I feel it every day every minute. I give it a thought daily to make sure I feel it even more. But we always go there for a special occasion and apparently that makes my butterflies go even more crazy. I’m still in my craze, lol. I just hope he doesn’t see my glances too much, because that might make him feel awkward.
[Drawing of a woman and a man looking crazy at her, with his mouth wide open while holding flowers and next to him are some hearts]. Maybe it looks like this (if we switch the genders), but I hope I can look a bit more attractive.
Saturday afternoon I planned to go on a ride with the horses. We had already arranged everything with the organisation, so the horse and two helpers were ready and my father came along too. Then it started to rain, hail and thunderstorm all at the same time. Even my undies were soaked, despite my four layers of clothing including rainwear. But when we were back at the stables, because the hail was hurting too much, it stopped and the sun started to shine. We could continue our trip and it was great to breath in the air in the forest and to connect with the horse. At first the horse didn’t want to go (this one always does that as usually people give up and she doesn’t have to work), but we got her to go and she seemed to enjoy the ride.
Saturday evening my father drove my fellow Hippo and I back to our house and the weather was still great. Despite the 5 rain/hail/thunderstorms we had during the day. So I decided to treat myself to a little handbike trip as well. It was great and I absolutely loved the past few days. Today I could spend a lot of time outside (I think 2 hours in total) which I can’t do that often and I just love nature! I haven’t been able to handbike for a while now, but I really enjoy it because it gives me a bit of freedom, once I’ve been set up. But I’ll also tell you more about my handbike some other time 🙂
Photo of a handbike attached to a wheelchair (this isn’t the exact same one I have, but it gives you a good idea).
I enjoy and appreciate feeling happy even more, because I was unable to feel this for many years. Even now I have to keep paying attention to doing things I truly enjoy or eventually I won’t do it anymore because of the PTSD and because I think it never gave me that happiness (because I haven’t felt it for a while since I didn’t do the activity). I still regularly I fall back into a depressed state for a short wile, but that’s ok so long it’s only for a short while. My partner supports me with it, although it’s still hard to experience a setback. However, this weekend was just filled with wonderful things and I wanted to share the happiness. It didn’t mean my body and that of my partner was suddenly “normal-able” or we didn’t have mental illnesses anymore. Nope, it’s still us including our diseases. But that doesn’t mean this weekend wasn’t wonderful and I enjoyed it a lot. I hope that my partner can eventually get rid of his recurring depression too and feel the same deep happiness I can feel. He really deserves it. Of course I hope you can all feel this too and also have great days, despite the problems you encounter/have/experience 🙂